GRACE IN ALL I SEE

My sparrows are back!  I know I could have put out bird seed a long time ago, and drawn them in, but if I did that, then I would be feeding the squirrels as well as my dog. (Yes, my stupid dog loves bird feed.)  Squirrels are cute, but they're also destructive.  Once they find a way into your attic, they never leave.  I know I'm sounding like an old curmudgeon, but I don't love squirrels. However, I do enjoy my sparrows, and I would love to feed them, especially during the winter.  So, I have a dilemma, feed the sparrows and squirrels, or let the sparrows fend for themselves.  

My neighbor feeds the squirrels.  For the longest of time he had three bird feeders placed throughout his yard, and they were all designed to prevent squirrels from getting to them.  They don't work! The squirrels violate every known law of physics and end up gobbling up the bird seed before the birds can get to it. To say the least, he has the fattest squirrels on the block.  They don't even bother to come into my yard. Why should they?  They get everything they need next door.  This isn't unique to my neighbor, though.  My dad lives out in the country, and he feeds the birds, the squirrels, deer, racoons, bears, and probably a host of other animals we don't even know about.  He's tried different ways to keep the deer out of his feeder, but when they want the feed, they just knock the feeder over.  Racoons are like squirrels, they violate every law of physics to get to what they want.  

So, what does bird feed have to do with grace?  Everything!

I've been doing a lot of study into grace for our Men's Group and have come to an amazing revelation about God's grace.  It flows!  It's like my neighbor who feeds the birds, and the squirrels.  My neighbor wants to bless the sparrows, so he shows them grace by feeding them birdseed.  The sparrows  don't work, or do anything special to deserve his favor, but he feeds them anyway.  He is gracious, they are blessed.  So are the squirrels.  Whether he wants to or not, he's feeding the squirrels, and continues to do so.  God's grace is the same way. His favor is extended to those who believe in Jesus Christ, but that favor ends up blessing the entire world.  This favor through Jesus the Messiah was originally extended to Abraham.  God wanted to show Abraham favor, and in so doing He blessed the entire world.  We're not even told why He showed favor to Abraham except for something about Abraham having faith in God. God explained the rules of grace when He said "Those who bless Israel will be blessed, and those who curse Israel will be cursed."   There is a correlation between God's favor to the children of Abraham and that favor extending out to every nation.  Not only does the favor extend out, but it flows through time.  Grace flows from the throne of God to those He favors, and ends up blessing everything, and everyone. It is expressed in Christian neighborhoods, and outwards to villages, cities, states, and nations. 

In today's world there is an open hostility toward people of faith, and if it continues unabated, mankind will be judged by their own stupidity.  God won't judge them, they'll judge themselves. The end of the world won't come because God gets angry at mankind, He's already been there, and done that.  God isn't mean like us.  He isn't going to have to kill anyone or wreak terrible plagues on mankind.  He will simply stop the flow of grace.  His first act of grace was to save Noah and his family.  His second attempt to show favor to mankind was through Abraham.  His last attempt was Jesus Christ.  When mankind attempts to destroy all vestiges of God by destroying the Church, God's favor will end, because there will be no reason for Him to keep feeding the sparrows.  All you have to do is look at the history of mankind to know that what I'm telling you is the truth.  In every country that used to be 'Christian' but eventually drove it away through persecution, that country quickly fell into ruin.  Every nation that persecuted or cursed the Jewish people was destroyed. Everywhere Judaism and Christianity are allowed to flourish, that nation will flourish as well as those around it. Christians aren't special, and like Abraham, the only reason God shows us favor is because of our faith.  Christians aren't smarter, more inventive than anyone else, we're just favored because we believe.  It's simple, but then again simple things confound the intellectual elites who dismiss God. It's too easy to be like the greedy squirrels, and believe that your own ingenuity is the reason for the birdseed.  This is where we seem to be at in America today.

I've been heartbroken to watch our great nation become more antagonistic toward people of faith. In the process, I've watched as pestilence has increased, not to mention the unending onslaught of storms, fires, and natural disasters.  In those states that are governed by socialist ideologues, the destruction is even more rampant. Where Christianity is mocked, regulated, or even legislated out of the way, the door to disaster is flung wide open.  God isn't doing it!  The unbelievers are doing it to themselves! He simply is not showing favor because they've driven the believers away.  Grace stops flowing.  

What made me realize this was watching my neighbor pull down his feeders at the beginning of the summer. (Maybe that's why my sparrows disappeared.)  He told me that he got tired of feeding the squirrels.  About a week ago I noticed he put a new feeder up in the front yard, which explains why my little friends are coming back.  On the other hand, if you drive away the sparrows, why is there a need for birdseed.  The descent into famine begins in a famine of the soul.  God's favor simply stops flowing.  His grace stops flowing.  The stinking squirrels mess everything up.  Grace is in all I see, but someday God will not have anyone to show favor to, and then the end of the world will come. I don't want that to happen, but it will because we've been told it will. 

In order to understand God's grace, maybe I will put up a feeder.  I know the squirrels will benefit from it, but I really want to bless my sparrows.  I've missed them this summer, and the squirrels aren't all bad.       

TRUST

Spring is in full bloom now.  My roses are beginning to be heavy with flowers, and most of the early bulbs and lilies are finished.  The trees are almost fully leafed out.  I have a tulip tree that still has blossoms all over it, and the sparrows are going crazy feasting on whatever feasts on the tulip tree blossoms.  We've had a wonderful mid-April through early May rain season as well as wonderful temperatures. Spring is already my favorite season of the year (my wife loves Fall more), but this year Spring has been a joy.  Every year I look forward to it, but sometimes winter hangs on too long and we end up with no fruit on the trees or the vines.  So, I am always grateful for this kind of Spring. 
Who am I grateful to?   God, of course!!  I trust He knows what we need, even if sometimes His plan doesn't quite fulfill my idea of what He should do.  As someone who grew up in the southwestern city of El Paso, Texas, I appreciate the full on green of Harrison, Arkansas.  Everything, everyone, and yes, even everyplace, has good things about them, and bad.  Growing up in El Paso, the daily paper kept a small little corner of the front page reserved for the "Sunshine Report".   The report simply kept a tabulation of how many days the sun shined over the city.  It didn't matter if the sun only came out for just a few minutes, it was still enough to add to the total.  I don't remember what year it was, but I do remember reading on one particular day that the sun had shone for 3,242 days.  I remember it because that day I went to school and wrote it on the chalkboard.  It impressed me that in just under ten years, the sun had shone that many days in a row.  During the day, my remark got the most remarks I'd ever got from anything I'd ever wrote. (My English teacher gave me a small corner in which to write my musings, and poetry.  Blame her for this blog.) The remarks went from "understated wow!", to "The sun is always shining, dummy!"   Reading those remarks left me a little hurt.  Was I truly the only one who thought it was amazing that this city had been blessed with a glimpse of the sun every day for over nine years?  It wasn't miraculous, nor was it even momentous, it was simply noteworthy. 
Since that time, I've lived in different parts of the country where the weather can hide the sun for as long as fourteen days in a row. (Talk about cabin fever.)  I remember a winter in Mtn Home, Idaho where thanks to the ash from Mt. St. Helens, we had a winter with so much snow that I had to cross country ski to work for a week.  Which even as bad as that was, is not as bad as I've heard about in different areas of the country.  One thing I've learned as I've grown up, is that even as dark or stormy as the weather may be, I have to trust that somewhere above the storm, the sun is shining.  So, my High School critic was really correct, just insensitive. 
I trust God, that this lovely blue marble is still spinning as it should, and that it is still orbiting the sun as it should.  I have to trust that even though I may not see it happening visibly with my eyes, I know it is happening.
The march of seasons is what allows this planet to support the mass of human beings living on its surface.  I know from what I've seen in the historical record, that there have been times on this planet where seasons weren't that pronounced.  There may come a day when through some amazing event, we may not see the sun, and this world will be thrown into chaos.  If that day were to come, I would still trust God's plan because I know Him.  I trust Him to continue to guide this amazing planet in its path through the solar system.  The only other alternative is to live in fear. 
As I watch the little sparrows going about their daily life, I wonder if they even have a clue as to how precarious the perch is that we all share on this amazing course through space?   Do they have an innate knowledge of God's provision?  Do they even care?  Do they trust?  These question often come to me while I watch their antics.  My heart tells me they don't, but then I wonder how I do? 
Lucky sparrows. 

TIME AND SPARROWS

I've often wondered if the little sparrows out in my yard are aware of time.  Do they mark their days by how long they have lived, or how many days they have left?   Do they mark their days at all?  Are we the only creatures on this planet who are aware of time?  We are obsessed with time, and it influences every aspect of our lives.  Almost midway through my sixth generation on this earth, I'm keenly aware of time. Both of my male grandparents died in their early sixties, and I've lived longer than both of them.  Do I have enough time left on this vale to do the things I dreamed of doing as a young man?  As I watch the sparrows flitting around in my front yard, I find myself wondering how old each one is.  I've learned to tell the difference between male and females by the coloration of their heads, but I don't have a clue as to how old a sparrow is.  I did some research and found out that sparrows have a life expectancy of three to five years in the wild.  I was shocked when I found that out.  Then again, I don't think they are concerned about it.  You never see bird sized Mylar balloons tied to a limb above the nest declaring the residents birthday.  Is time only important to us?

Why is time important to us? Everything we do on this earth is measured in time.  I love to ask pre-schoolers how old they are.  They usually respond with a corresponding number of fingers and then for some inexplicable reason they will add a fraction to their declaration.  "I'm three and a half!" With the half being important in a way that I don't understand.  I probably did when I was three and a half, but not now.  Time moves so quickly now at this point in my life, I quickly add the next year just a couple of months after my birthday.  So much of how we live on this planet is governed by time.  We are paid for a combination of our skills and time, with the true value being time.  Without fail, I've watched those who are paid a salary eventually do the math to discover what their time is worth.  Even doctors and lawyers measure their services in time.  At the end of our days, the march of time has been the measure of worth. 

As Christians we have a unique view of time.  We are keenly aware of the history that proceeded us, and we are hopeful of the eternity that will follow our departure from this vale.  We even have mental imagery of our eternal home framed from a few words in a book that very few seem to believe in any more.  Yet, at the end of our days I've watched Christians cling to this life as if it were the only existence they'll ever know.  It isn't an accident that the best medical treatments, and hospitals are in predominantly Christian nations.  Christians value life, and for some strange reason we are focused on making it last as long as possible. Whether the scientists, and doctors who practice medicine believe in God or not, the people they treat do. 

I had a good friend in the Lord present a graphic that has ministered to me time and again.  He used our video projector to show a small dot in the center of the screen.  He made the statement that he wanted that dot to represent a lifetime of 90 years.  If he zoomed in, the dot soon filled the screen.  At first you could see the pixels at the edge of the dot, and then nothing but a black screen.  Then as he zoomed out, the dot completely disappeared.  Zooming out is the same as viewing our lives through eternity.  Of the billions and billions of lives that have filled this earth, there are very few who have achieved immortality by being remembered throughout the eons of time.  Yet, for the Christian we believe in immortality even if we aren't remembered by those who follow us. This life should be measured by how we love in the few short days we have on this vale.  Our mistakes, successes, and our dreams have but a few moments to shine in this tent we live in.  I believe that in the long run, love is the only thing that conquers time.  It was God's love for us that brought us into existence, and it is His love that takes us into the future.  Time is not a captor, jailer, or measure of our value.   We look for the day when time is of no consequence to us and all the good we did will be revealed.  That is our hope.

I have no great feats that I've done upon this vale.  As far as I know, I've not saved one life through my actions.  I can count on the fingers of two hands the number of souls that I've personally led to a knowledge of Jesus Christ.  Sure I've preached and seen people come up and give their lives to serve Jesus, but there is a difference.  If I'm remembered at all after I'm gone, I want to be remembered as a teacher of men.  I want to someday be walking on whatever heavenly street I live on and have someone come up to me and say; 'because of you, I know Jesus.'  That will be worth it for me. 

You see, from the moment I was conceived, I was dying.  Time came to me, and when I leave, time will go on.  I have no desire to live forever upon this ragged earth.  This vale is too cruel, and of late, it appears to be more so.  I am weary of the killing, and cruelty I see.  I'm weary of the hatred toward one another just because of where you were born.  I am weary of the anger, and struggle between ideas that we all want to enforce upon another.  Despite my weariness, I'm happy to be alive.  I'm thrilled to still have a choice.  That is why I believe in Christianity, it is a choice.  You don't have to agree with me, because you don't have to believe.  It may insult you that I believe in a better place for those who believe in Jesus Christ, but in the end why does it offend you?  Is it because you're not sure eternity awaits you?  There's the rub!!!! 
No one can be sure.  Even the most devout atheist has to believe there isn't a God, and because it is a belief, it also means, you aren't sure.  You don't have empirical evidence.  Sad isn't it?  Time marches on, and in the end the lingering question is; "is there more to life than this?" Once I pass this vale, why would I care enough to come back and prove there is more?  Can I come back?  Christians have those answers, but they require faith.  It's almost laughable, if it wasn't so sad.  I don't believe this life is all there is, I can't even do a 'what if'.  When I lay this mortal tent aside, I will have lived well, and loved as well as I could.  I have done nothing worthy of eternal remembrance, but this earth isn't immortal.  It too will be rolled up like a scroll and our dying sun will destroy it in a fiery death throe.  Still the universe will go on.  My life will be just another small breath in billions breathed upon this doomed planet. Eternity will be a celebration of lives lived, yes even mine.  My dot in the frame of eternity will be happy.  I will go to my grave, happy, and wake happy. 

I don't know if there is an eternity for sparrows.  Now that I know they have short life spans, my heart breaks for them.  How old is the plump little guy who's working his way beneath my Clematis right now?   Will he be here next spring?   Will I?     

Time will tell.

The Secret to Happiness

There is a secret to being happy.    It isn't free health care, free college, free lunches, free houses, or anything politicians try to tell you will make you happy.  The secret to happiness isn't in money, things, or even in great power.  The secret to happiness is being content.  Personally, I believe if more of us subscribed to contentment, it cold help improve the lives of people everywhere.  Happiness isn't found just in Christianity, although I believe it goes a long way to making a difference. 
Though I profess Christ, and live for my faith,  the happiness that comes from contentment isn't in Christ either. I've seen too many people live happily without a faith in Christ to make it a prerequisite for happiness. At the same time I've seen far too many Christians living lives devoid of contentment, and wracked with despair.  So, why am I writing about the secret to happiness in a blog dedicated to a profession in Jesus Christ?
The answer to that question is simple; I don't want to see my brothers and sisters in Christ looking for happiness in places that will not bring them any joy. 
If you use a clinical description of happiness, you will discover it is fleeting in it's duration, but so powerful in it's force, that it makes everyone of us seek to be happy for but just a moment.  Happiness is such a powerful emotion we look for ways to induce it.  Within this need for happiness is the root of almost all of our addictions.  Our bodies betray us because the 'high' from being happy is like nothing else we experience. The need to be happy whether through artificial means, or through natural means, can lead us into the depths of despair if we aren't careful.  That doesn't mean our need for happiness is completely destructive.  The 'arts' are born out of happiness.  Games, comedies, jokes, hobbies, and yes, even storytelling in its many varied forms are a means to happiness.  Sadly, the flood of hormones that accompanies true happiness is limited in its ability to be sustained for long periods of time. The greatest sorrow is when we live our lives in search of happiness instead of yielding to the joy found in every moment.  When jobs, marriages, homes, cars, and the accessories of life become the driving force for satisfaction we miss the moments within ourselves that bring true happiness.  This opens the door for disappointment, sorrow, and grief, which are far more easily sustained. Somehow, in the rush for a new 'happy' high, we leave the real source of happiness behind.  This is true whether we are rich or poor, Christian or non-Christian.  When contentment eludes us, happiness quickly flees. 
Over my lifetime I've seen great men and women of God become lost and empty vessels devoid of joy, peace or happiness.  Christians can easily be fooled into believing that a ministry, study, or even a cause will bring them happiness.  Ministries can push you beyond your purpose in Christ into fears of failure fueled by the minister's comparison of their life with those of more successful ministries. People who feel bible study, or the search for spiritual truth can bring  happiness often fail to discover that happiness, allowing the study itself to rob them of the joy found in living in the joy of the moment.  Probably the worst thief of happiness among Christians is the need to defend their faith or advance that faith into secular causes.  I've seen too many good Christians become enslaved to the angrier side of their passions to the point they hate the very people God has called us to reach.
Happiness is found in being content with forgiveness, and forgiving.  This is the simple power we all carry within us, but it is the springboard for more joy than you can contain.  So much of what I'm seeing in the news media today is driven by a failure to forgive, and let go.  Then again, I know we can become consumed by our passions to the point where happiness is driven far from us.  Political, cultural, religious, and ethnic diversity are important things when it comes to aligning ourselves in tribes. Belonging to a tribe can be a great source of joy and happiness, but if we allow them to exclude us from tolerance, and contentment,  they can suck the happiness out of our lives.  You hear a lot these days about 'diversity' but it seems the more diverse we attempt to be as a nation, the more unhappy we become.  Diversity robs us of happiness by building walls of 'difference,' and before you know it, you don't have the happiness that comes from tolerating people who are different from you.  "Intersectionality" is a word you hear a lot about lately because of the 'diversity' craze.  It's the moment when the goals of one 'diverse' group conflicts with the goals of another.  Someday, when the dust settles from this crazy need to be unique, we'll wonder how we allowed ourselves to be so overcome with the celebration of diversity. Instead of celebrating our humanity, we become obsessed with defending our uniqueness.  At one point or another 'diversity' will bring you into conflict with another diverse person.  This is why I said that many Christians aren't happy.  Tolerance, which is simply forgiving another person for being different from you, is rarely practiced among denominations.  It's the result of hundreds of years of conditioning, and is often based on tribalism, and in that alone, the fear of losing a unique identity. 
Contentment speaks of true faith.  I've seen it in the lives of those in foreign countries less prosperous than the United States.  I've seen happiness in children's laughter everywhere I've been.  That is why I can say that happiness isn't found in things, money, or power.  Happiness is found in any moment you choose to savor and enjoy.   I see it in my simple enjoyment of the sparrows that are carrying on outside my front door.  I don't know why it brings me so much joy to look out my storm door and watch the antics of these tiny little creatures who inhabit my front yard.  All I know is that they bring a smile to my face, which is usually a clue that I'm happy.  It won't last for long, I'll have to close the door because it's getting colder, and they'll have to carry on without my observing them, but they will carry on.  That brings another smile to my face. 

ALIVE

There are times I say things out of habit I wish I wouldn't say.  Most of my habitual speech is a product of over fifty years of being a Christian.  A good portion of that speech isn't found in the bible, but grew in Christian circles because it sounded good.  The other day I was talking to a friend of over 20 years when I suddenly realized how cliche I'd become.  Out of habit, he asked me how I was doing.  I have a small group of answers I use based upon who I'm talking to.  Some of them are cute, some of them are dull, and some of them are MEANT to be spiritual. 
"Praise God, I woke up alive and breathing, so I guess I'm doing good."  I replied. 
As soon as I said it I felt pricked in my heart.  Don't get me wrong, I've said something like this for a good portion of my life.  I remember hearing it for the first time as a teenager from an evangelist who said that anytime you wake up in the morning, you are blessed.  So, I've wrapped it up in my own special flavoring and done many different variations on that theme.  This time, I was stopped in my tracks.  There was so much wrong with what I'd said.  I stumbled around for a few seconds trying to figure out what I'd just done, and mostly to listen to Holy Spirit to tell me why He'd elbowed me in my spirit.  It only took a few more seconds, by which time I'm sure my friend was mystified by the look of confusion on my face.  My banter is usually fluid, easy, and quick.  Occasionally, I'll stumble around, but never over a greeting.  Suddenly I knew what I'd said glorified this life, and not the eternal life to which I place my hope. 
At 64 years of age, I am at the point in my life where my parents are nearing the end of their days.  Both of my wife's parents have passed on.  At one time, I had over thirteen aunts and uncles, now that list is down to four.  Three of my older cousins have passed this vale, and I don't know how long I have.  I'm not eager to die, nor do I believe this life is dreary enough to warrant departing by my own hand.  Yet, within me is the knowledge that I have a ticket to a better life, a different home, a brighter place, and a love greater than any I can ever know on this earth, and I've known love!
As Christians, I believe we can worship this life to the point that it becomes an idol.  We accumulate things that won't go in our coffins, we boast of our achievements that will be forgotten the moment we pass, and our money is more often spent on comfort than the needs of others.  These are the things that Christ warned us about.  We weren't supposed to make this place our home. 
A few years back someone I know lost their grandfather.  This simple man of God would go out every morning and walk about two miles out and then head back to his rural home.  This was his time of prayer.  It was when he chose to talk to Jesus.  One morning as he walked, and prayed, a vehicle struck him and he passed from life to life.  One moment he was talking with Jesus, and the next he was with Jesus.  While people were stunned by the suddenness of his death, and brokenhearted by their loss, he was celebrated for his life, and applauded into his glorious life. 
Another breath is simply more time to do the work I was purposed to do.  So, as my friend sat there wondering where I went in my brain, I remembered what my purpose was, and why my glib reply bugged me.
"I'm sorry for what I said."  I replied.  "I'm doing well, praise God, but someday, I'll be doing better."
I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad for hanging on to this life.  It is our nature to survive, and for our bodies to cling to life.  I begrudge no one the battle to live another day.  On the other hand, moving on isn't the end.  That is where the peace of God is. 
Sadly this morning, my lawn is quiet.  The chatter of sparrows hasn't started because the sun hasn't even turned the horizon a dark blue yet.  It won't rise for another hour and I am about to go to church.  I'll worship God for the life he's given me, and the eternal life I have through His Son, Jesus.  If I pass this vale today, then I'll wait for all of you who are my friends.  Well, maybe I won't wait.  I'll just see you there.   

NEW YEAR, NEW THOUGHTS

The holidays are over and I'm wondering what the new year is going to bring.  I've never been big on new year resolutions because they infer knowing that we have more than today.  None of us know how long we have left in this life.  I'm not morbid, or fatalistic, but there are some things that are simply the truth.  I don't care who you are, how rich, powerful, strong, or healthy you are, you have no promise of tomorrow.  So, New Years resolutions are a waste of energy. 
What is the promise of New Years day?  Why is it different than any other day?  I think we make a big deal about it because we as human beings like to believe there is hope for something better.  I used to view my days on this earth in terms of how old I am, and how many days I think I have left.  With this new year has come new thoughts.
All I have is the next heartbeat, the next breath, the next thought.  Everything I've framed my life in since I can remember has been focused on 'time.'  Even my relationship with Jesus Christ is focused on time.  Who I am is determined by time.  To wax biblical, my days on this earth are marked by my white hair, and the wrinkles upon my face, but they don't define who I am inside.  Still if someone were to see me, they would say I was 'old.'  For a vertically challenged person like me, looking old was all I wanted to do.  There was a day when it didn't matter how old I was, I was often viewed as being younger than 18.  So, being old isn't something I'm worried about.  Being at peace with God, myself, and others is.
Through faith in Christ, being at peace with God came a long time ago.  Through that faith in Christ I have been able to live at peace with almost everyone around me.  However, being at peace with myself is something that is a recent development.  Even within that peace, I've been going through a major conflict in my life that has challenged me in every aspect of my life, even in my faith.  I've alluded to it over the last few posts, but it seems to have come to a place where I don't think it will turn out the way I'd hoped.  Time moves on, putting it's stamp upon every millisecond, minute, hour without seeing the resolution I'd hoped for.  I wanted nothing but good in this situation, but it hasn't happened.  For a long time I was walking around gritting my teeth, feeling helpless, and wishing for love to rule the day.  Now I know I can only hope for this minute, this instant, this moment.  I can't change others around me.  I can only change me. 
The first time I mentioned this in my blog I said it would be something I would look back on with an assurance that God has been with me throughout the whole thing. Even then I knew I would be at peace with the situation, but I wanted to be honest with my feelings as I went 'through' it. 
It is time to reveal what I felt:  First and foremost is a sense of deep disappointment with people I thought I knew as well as I know myself.  I didn't feel betrayed, just disappointed.  It's hard to judge someone when they disappoint you, because I know I've disappointed so many people in my life.  I can't even be angry, just disappointed. Almost 60 years ago, someone I love made a fateful decision that has changed my life today.  Nothing can alter the consequences of that decision, but I am determined to live every moment celebrating the love those consequences has brought into my life. 
The other day I was discussing this with someone who is on the other side of the consequences, and they said something very profound that I'm going to hold onto for the rest of my moments.  "Fear destroys Peace."  I refuse to let fear, or disappointment control my life.  Love is the best thing I can do, and I am determined to let love rule my life. Why?  Because I don't have enough time to do anything else, I only have the next moment. 

TENDERNESS

The other day as I was going into one of our local stores I happened on a scene that brought tears to my eyes.  A young mother and father were going in as I was getting out of my truck.  The mother had a newborn she was carrying in her arms, and the father was holding the hand of his little toddler daughter.  The little girl seemed happy and full of joy as she reached out for her mother.  With her arms full, there was no way the mother could scoop up her daughter, at which point the little girl began to cry. The father quickly scooped up his daughter and swung her up onto his shoulders, at which I could hear her cry turn into giggles.
Tenderness, plain and simple.
The reason it brought tears to my eyes is because even in my best moments I don't remember being that tender with my own children.  I'm not saying I wasn't ever tender, but it wasn't as natural as I saw with that young father.
If you look up the term 'tenderness' it means gentleness, and kindness.  God's own description of His nature is that he is gentle, and compassionate.  Gentleness and tenderness implies that the one showing tenderness is able or capable of being hard and callous to others.  It also implies that the one being treated with tenderness is physically smaller, or weaker than the one demonstrating tenderness.  God in his immense power and strength is tender, compassionate, and infinitely kind to those he created.  It was and still is in His power to completely obliterate or manipulate our fragile lives.  Instead he holds us tenderly and gently in his hand.  When we are old enough to walk on our own He holds our hands until we reach too far or want something that could destroy us.  Then He throws us onto His shoulders.
This relationship with the creator of the universe has become clearer the older I've become.  Like adolescents and teenagers, we can rebel and move far away from our loving, tender, Father, but it doesn't change His love.  He will always be there waiting and willing to scoop us up when we decide to come back to Him.
I know God loves me because he gives me a choice to love him back.  The power of choice is His greatest gift of love to us. It is proof of His tenderness that he gives us the choices we have.  He's not afraid of our choices, and at the same time He tries to help us make good ones. 
I've had people try to tell me how cruel God is because He lets people die, or go through horrifying experiences.  They'll throw out some terrible cruelty done by people to other people and ask me how He could allow that to happen.  My question is usually; "How do you suggest He take care of it?"  What would you do?   We don't have the benefit of seeing time from one end to the other.  We don't know who would be a monster, or who would be a saint.  Yet, in His immense love, the choice is there.  I don't want to be God, because I know my flaws and my nature.  It would be easy to say 'kill the Hitlers of the world before they are even born.  How many people would you be willing to snuff out of existence simply because they would later be monsters.  Eventually, you would become as monstrous as the ones you were trying to prevent from becoming monsters.  If you were God, would you tap their mind and make them 'good' people before they become 'evil?'  When would you stop allowing choice?  There is a tendency today to try to control how people think, what they can say, and what they can do, all in the name of safety.  It is an experiment that will end in disaster.  What constitutes a criminal act?  We really don't know what someone is until they do an evil act.  Till then we must be tenderhearted, and learn from the creator how to step back from the precipice of judgment.
Tenderness is the control of great strength, and the ability to keep your strength from hurting someone.  I always love to watch big muscled men pick up a little baby.  You know that these hulking strong men could crush the little life in their hands, but instead they tenderly cradle the little life in their arms.  To me, this is the definition of the tenderness of God.  Tenderness defines God. 
Outside in my yard, fragile sparrows are beginning to do their usual morning ritual.  They know a loving, tender, creator who's heart is ever concerned.  Jesus said not even one sparrow can fall to the ground without the Father knowing.  If He cares so much for the sparrows, how much more does He care for us.  If we trust him as the sparrows do, we'll see His tenderness as we swing gleefully onto His broad shoulders. We'll feel his unfailing compassion when we are cradled in his love.  Help us all to be tenderhearted toward one another.

TRUTH

It's a wonderful Wednesday morning, and for those who know me well, Wednesday is like Friday in most peoples lives.  I look forward to Wednesday night services, because they are usually populated with people seeking to worship and grow in spiritual knowledge.  So, for that reason alone, I'm feeling excited about this day.   It's five in the morning, I'm sitting with my laptop in my recliner.  Glenda has left for work, and I have the house to myself.  This is my quiet time for writing emails, blogs, or editing my book I'm writing.  It's that wonderful time of year when I can open a window or a door and let the cool crisp air flow in from the outside.  It's just a little muggier than I like, but getting the stuffiness out of the room feels good.  

Sadly, the sparrows haven't awakened yet.  It's peaceful and calm outside.  

I don't usually use this blog to comment on political matters, because they are usually filled with the strife of people trying to exert influence over others through whatever means necessary.  Politics is the arena of human nature.  It is a place where peace rarely rests its hat.  Within the United States the two political forces can be summed up in simple ideology.  Those who claim to be liberal, want everyone to believe that all people are inherently good and that everyone has worth.  If you don't agree with their view, you are inherently evil, and have no worth.  They cling to a view that everyone will eventually grow into a cosmic whole of love, peace, and unity of purpose.  They (the left) are convinced that if we would all come to accept and believe what they believe, the world would be a better place. If you don't agree with that view, you are unworthy of human status.  

On the other end of that spectrum is the view that everything has to stay as it is, without question, without variation, without a hint of change.  Nothing changes, all is as it was, and people who want to change are frightening.  The radical right is defined by castes, cliques, and clubs.  If you don't agree with us, you are subversive, and destructive.  It is predicated upon the view that all people are incapable of making proper choices and should be directed into purpose as they define it.  

Both extremes of the political spectrum have committed evil in the propagation of their beliefs.  

With that said, I'm going to dip my toe into the political firestorm of the Judge Kavanaugh affair.  I hope this will be the first and last time I do something like this with this blog.  Why?  Because, there is a need for something more valuable than political purposes here. With a view to transparency (Is there any really needed here?) I am an evangelical conservative Christian.  For me, Judge Kavanaugh is someone I can support.  Although, he is Catholic, his conservative views are in line with what I hold.  Yet, there is one value yet to be validated.  Truth!

As anyone who has read my blogs knows, I am all about peace.  Not peace as men know it, but peace as given by a loving creator.  That peace transcends spiritual matters into the affairs of men.  I could go through a long list of spiritual matters that will not transcend into human affairs, because without a relationship with God, they hold no import.  However, TRUTH is one of those things that determine justice, and in turn affects peace.  Without truth, their is conflict in every aspect of life.  I realize some cultures value cunning, and deception.  Without deception of one kind or another, I truly believe humans would obliterate one another.  As humans, we withhold truth in order to maintain relationship, and we believe we have peace.  At a personal level, if we knew what people really believed about us, we would become murderous, and isolated.  Perhaps, that is why God didn't give us His ability to know what another person is thinking.  So, when I say truth brings peace, I am saying truth in as far as people resolving conflict.

So, what do we as Christians do when we are confronted with what we see in the current state of affairs between a nominated Judge, and an accusing woman.  WE SEEK TRUTH.  

For one thing, we don't know what happened 36 years ago.  We don't know who is telling the truth.  I hate to say it, but just because the accuser is a woman, doesn't mean she deserves to be believed.  Just because she may not have a reason to falsely accuse Judge Kavanaugh doesn't mean she should be believed.  On the other hand, just because Judge Kavanaugh has led an exemplary adult life, doesn't mean he didn't do what he is accused of doing.  Somewhere in the midst of this struggle that is outside the arena of this present truth, there is another struggle going on that makes the truth of greater import.  

I want Judge Kavanaugh to be confirmed to the Supreme Court, but not at the expense of the truth.  If I am willing to sacrifice the truth for an expedient end, I am no better than those who distort the truth in both sides of the media circus surrounding this story.  So as a Christian what do I do?  

Answer, I will choose to cherish truth.  I will cry out to my loving creator to bring truth to the forefront.

I don't fear the mid-term elections, or a hypothetical outcome I can't see.  I don't sacrifice truth in the rush to put someone into a seat of power that God may not want them in.  If I can't trust God with the day to day existence of my life human life, then I should stop serving him completely.  He knows the truth, and as the Bible says, the truth will set you free.  Christians shouldn't become part of the feeding frenzy that is this current political battle.  We should be the calming voice calling for truth.  At the same time, the truth doesn't take forever.  IF it is the truth, Perhaps, nearly 36 years ago a little 15 year old girl should have told her parents that she'd gone to a party with older kids and in their drunken stupor she'd almost been raped. We're told by her own account that she feared her parents reactions. Now, the truth may be forever marred by human opinion.  That is the price of secrecy.  The truth is already compromised by fear. Courage is the bosom buddy of truth.  

I often tell the men I pastor of a time in my childhood when I was a serial liar.  As a toddler my Dad caught me with my hand in the cookie jar and I still declared 'I didn't do it.'  Throughout my adolescence I would lie all the time.  Then one day, my brother used one of my dad's tools to repair his bicycle and left it outside to be rained on.  Dad found it in the yard and immediately blamed me.  I denied it vehemently, but it was of no avail, in his mind I was a liar, and I was lying then.  I received one of the worst whippings of my childhood, not because of its severity, but because as each stroke of the belt fell on my body, I knew I hadn't done what I was accused of.  I was innocent of the crime.  As I sat in my room crying a truth hit me that affected the course of my life forever.  I would tell the truth to my dad no matter what.  If it meant I would be punished, at least I would be punished for what I did.  I would tell him when I'd violated his personal spaces, strayed beyond decency, and experimented with my growing sexual urges.  In short, he and my mother would be privy to the truth of my life, even in the embarrassing stuff.  Because of that, my father eventually began to trust me when I made my declination of events I didn't do. Since that time I haven't always told the truth, and I haven't always revealed my deepest darkest secrets.  I've done things I'm ashamed of to this day, and I believe they are better locked away in the past.  To many people, those 'crimes' would be laughable.  At the same time to others they would be horrifying. If asked, however, I would tell the truth.  I have to believe that Judge Kavanaugh has learned the same lessons as myself, or I would not want him on the highest court in our land.  

Tomorrow, Judge Kavanaugh, and his accuser will both tell their stories to a nation in political turmoil.  In the wings of that chamber of human endeavors will be truth.  Believe me, there is truth out there, and that truth will win, no matter the outcome.  I can say that because I believe in a loving, and just God who judges above the will and and whims of humankind.  When this is all over with, the question for Christians isn't whether truth won out or not.  Truth doesn't always win out in the court of human affairs. My brother never got a whipping for leaving that wrench outside.  Everyday, innocent people die, the weak suffer, the poor get overridden, and despots continue to subdue. Yet, in the affairs of God, truth will be revealed.  All will be revealed.  When humans fail to believe that, the truth is of no value.  Without the truth, peace becomes elusive, and tyranny prevails.  These are things I know from my short 63 years on this earth.  I've seen the price of half-truths, outright lies, and hidden truth first hand.  I've seen what happens when we value secrecy more than transparency.  

So, I will try my hardest to watch the full Senate hearings, not the encapsulated reports of either side of the media.  I will pray that the truth prevails, no matter the political outcome, because I know a just judge is presiding over tomorrows proceedings.  I will ask Him to reveal the truth, because I know He values truth.  I will lay aside my anxious heart, my dubious musings, and my preconceptions for a moment of peace.  I will ask Holy Spirit to remove my prejudice and replace it with wisdom from His throne.  Like Solomon of old, I will ask for the means to know who is telling the truth.  I urge all of my Christian brothers and sisters to trust God and believe that He will reveal the truth.  Why?  

Because only the truth can bring peace.  

As a final word, the horizon is beginning to turn a beautiful deep blue as this world spins its daily course around our lovely sun.  I am beginning to hear the faint chirps of sparrows in the tree outside my eastern window.  They are waking up to a new day, unconcerned with the mess of human events, and the political wranglings I am focused on.  They will spend their day looking for food, seeking shelter, and living out their day trusting in the one who provides them with this awesome universe in which we live.  Tomorrow will come whether they live to see it or not.  Tomorrow will come, and that is all the truth they need to know.  

IF

There is a word in my vocabulary that isn't very big, but has an immense power beyond its size.  That word is 'IF'.  

Try going more than five minutes without using the word.  I doubt seriously any english speaking person can go that long.  I looked up the word 'if' in as many languages as I could and found out that it is a small word in almost all languages.  Yet, as small as the word is, it signifies a profound understanding of the universe around us.  'IF' forms the basis of most computational programs across the globe.  'IF' forms the basis of most of our decisions as humans.  It is common to almost all cultures, and people groups.  IF is also the basis for most religions across our globe.  As a Christian, though, the word IF has come to be a symbol of doubt.  Within the word IF you find uncertainty and to some degree ignorance.  This weekend I made a statement concerning an action I wished to occur and used the word IF.  I was immediately rebuked for doubting and expressing negativity.  After much thought, I came to accept the rebuke, but at the same time I hold the same thought in mind to measure the degree of uncertainty with which I do not know the will of God for the situation I was speaking about.  In other words, God's plan may not be my will.  That is the danger of 'Word of Faith.'  Even when we know God's expressed will about general things in this life, we are often confronted with instances where His plan circumvents or overrides his will.  The problem with 'if' is that it can be presumptuous or it can be fearful.  IF is always a question.  A question implies choices and sometimes we don't do choices well.  We especially don't do choices well when it comes to the will of God.   We know from scripture that it is not God's will that anyone should perish, but that all should come to eternal life.  We also know that there will be those that won't.  Every day people die without repenting or accepting the saving grace of God. This is not God's will, but it is the truth.  The reason for this, is that God loves us so much, He gives us choices.  It is a loving God that allows us to have free will, even when that will brings Him pain, and even when it ends in separation from Him.  God gave us the 'if' so we could be uniquely able to accept or reject Him.  Anyone who looks beyond the next moment is confronted with 'if'.  Our choices determine not only our future, but the future of those we touch everyday, as well as unborn generations to follow.  In my own life, I've come face to face with a bad choice made many years ago by someone I love greatly.  That choice now has the energy to bring great love, or great disaster  to our family.  It was not that person's desire, nor their intent at the time to do harm, but it can.  It also can bring great joy to all affected IF those affected by the decision choose to let go of fear.  That choice so many years ago brought a great goodness into this earth, but the cost could be inestimable if forgiveness isn't offered.  I've seen in my short 63 years upon this earth that when we make decisions or choices that were wrong at the moment, God affords us an opportunity to make it right somewhere along the line.  Giving someone the opportunity to be forgiven is what God is all about. IF can color our days with joy, or sadness.  IF can shade us with peace, or burn us with fear.  Eternity hangs on IF. 

Humankind has immortalized IF in so many ways.  "If only,"  "If he/she,"  "if they", "if I,"  and a host of other variations filled with regret.  We often couch our regrets in "if I could do it all over again," then we fill in the blanks.  The thing with regrets, is that they do nothing to change what happened.  "I'm sorry" is nice as a sentiment, but it reveals a failure to value the 'if' choice.  Sometimes our 'IF' choices result in the death of another, or great bodily injury to another, and the apology that follows rings small in comparison to the harm done.  There are also many 'if' choices that we'll never see the results of, but down the road will play out in future generations.  "I'm sorry," will not remove or ease the sting of those choices.  That is why God gave us two laws to 'live' by.  His commandments should guide us at that point where IF connects with action.  Living by the greater law of love moves us into a higher threshold of IF.  The law of love removes selfish consideration from the 'if/then' equation.  Once that happens, love conquers fear, and peace becomes the expression of that love.  Love makes our choices clearer and less cluttered with IF.  Love is the word of faith we should all live by.  That is why the Apostle Paul could say in 1st Corinthians 13: 13 (KJV)  and NOW abideth faith, hope, and charity (love), but the greatest of these is charity. 

Faith and hope are 'IF's, love is certain.  When you live LOVE, you solidify faith, and strengthen hope.  Without LOVE, faith and hope are empty vessels, heavy weights, and tormenting burdens.  It is LOVE that shapes peace.  

This is where we are greater than the sparrows.  As I'm writing this the eastern horizon is beginning to glow with the promise of the sunrise.  I can see thin clouds in the grey blue sky, but they can't hide the fact that above them the sun will shine whether I see it our not.  don't worry that the sun isn't shining on me, because I know that somewhere it is shining.  I may not live another day to see the sun shine again, but I know the sun will shine.  As long as I can awaken to God's grace, and love, I will not fear. In that way the sparrow has me beat.   I can hear a dog barking, and yes my gentle sparrows are already chirping and playing outside my office window.  As much as I enjoy the sparrows perch, there is one thing I know... they can't know the love I know in Christ Jesus.  This is the power of 'if' in my life.  When I fulfill the law of Christ, my regrets are fewer, I have less apologies to make, and IF doesn't rule my life.  I can then live in Peace.  

SUFFERING WITH OTHERS

As a handyman, I'm often called out to inspect damage, and give estimates for fixing the situation.  Most of the time, I'm satisfied that what I tell the prospective customer is valid and affordable.  I tend to lean more toward the affordable solution than one that is costly.  I know what it is like to have something break down or stop working without having the funds to fix it.  So, I tend to be just a little sensitive to people's financial needs.  Sometimes I will have a customer tell me that money is not an issue, but you know it is. 
There are times I go out to look at a job and find myself wishing I'd never gone out to look at it.  Such was the case for me this last week.  I was asked to go make a bid for putting a deck up around a double wide modular home way out in the country.  The couple had bought the home and were in the process of getting it moved when the husband died from a massive heart attack.  AS anyone knows who's gone through the death of a loved one, it can take well over a year before you get your feet back on the ground.  Such was the case with this customer.  When I drove out to the location of the home, I discovered that the two halves of the home were never fully joined together and that the ridge cap on the roof was never installed.  In simple terms, the home had sat open to the elements for over a year.  The movers had brought over the decking and materials only to throw them in heaps. 
I grew up in the mobile home industry from the time I was six or seven years old, and I can tell you that double-wides left open to the elements rarely go back together well.  As I looked at the home in shambles, my heart broke for the woman who'd called me out to look at it.   I had nothing but bad news to give her, and she didn't have a husband to help her bear the brunt of the bad news.  Even putting up the deck would be a disaster, and cost much more than I'd 'primed' her for before I went out. 
So, you might be wondering what if anything this has to do with the Sparrow's Perch and the peace of God.  Let me tell you.
The peace of God is ours even in the midst of tragedy.  As this week has unfolded, I've watched with great sorrow the slow and methodical approach of hurricane Florence.  As I write this, I know it will slam North Carolina like a freight train.  It will be a miracle if no one is killed, and an even greater miracle if there is no great property damage.  Just the predicted rain amounts alone are catastrophic.  Sometime this week, someone will be faced with death and destruction.  What do you say to console, or offer comfort?  What do you do? 
This brought the situation with my customer into even greater focus.  I'm on point with the customer.  They are part of my faith family, and someone I want to bless.  Sadly, I don't have the means to bless them.  I will continue to worship with her, and will shake her hand every time she comes to church, but I'll also know that I could not do anything to change her situation.  It is in God's hands. 
And that is the purpose of this blog.  Being in God's hands means that we can face the discouragements and the joys with the same trust in God.  There is an old Hebrew tradition called two pockets.  In one pocket you carry a note that says: "The Universe was created for me."  In the other is the statement; "I am but dust."  It is the essence of finding peace in God.  I know that God's peace is found both in the joys and the sorrows of this life. 
There is another Hebrew story that says King Solomon was tasked to provide a statement that would be applicable in all situations of life.  Solomon had his craftsman forge a ring with the inscription "and this too shall pass away."  Whether we are overcome with great joy, giddy happiness, pride from great achievements, or just the fruits of our labors, we know that it will pass amidst the inevitability of death, sickness, disaster, and even failure.  What is true of these things is that the terrors that beset us by night will soon fade and pass away into greater joy, happiness, and yes, peace. 
The sparrows have already begun to sing outside in my front yard.  The majestic silver maple that had been their perch for many years was cut down last week because the ants had devoured it from the inside out.  They have now taken up residence in the smaller pin oak on the corner of my lot.  They didn't lose faith in God because the maple was gone, no, they moved on to another tree.  I felt sorry for them when I had to cut the tree down, but soon realized that they weren't destroyed by the situation. 
I grieved all last week for my beloved sister in the Lord because I knew that I didn't have a solution for her.  I wanted to make it better for her, but it isn't in my power to do so.  Just the materials alone are beyond my financial ability to repair her home.  Could she sue the people who left her home open to the elements?  I don't know.  Would that even help?   What is the answer?  I know I'm not.  I grieve with her, and feel compassion for her.  I was ready to try and get the men of our fellowship to help me put the house right, but it would be a process that would take weeks.  I cried when I told her how much I thought it would cost to fix the home.  She doesn't have it.  What will be the story after Florence hits North Carolina?  Will someone like me have to tell a customer that their home of many years is destroyed beyond repair.  Do we miss the entire point to this? 
At least you are alive to be told the bad news.  The good news is that this too shall pass. 

AT PEACE WITH YOURSELF

I read a lot.  Not as much as I used to, (As a child, I used to read cereal boxes in the morning before heading out for the day).  Now, I read enough to stay current, and informed.  Being a reader makes it hard for me to take the time to write, even though I love to write.  I don't write as much as I used to, because my work schedule is not suited to it right now.  Now, if someone wanted to pay me to write....but, that could get old quick.
For those who've taken the time to read my past blogs, you know this blog is all about being at peace with God, others, and yourself.  Being at peace is something people have a hard time with right now.  Politically, socially, and even spiritually, people seem to be in turmoil.  People seem to be conflicted about their culture, gender, socio-economic status, sexual orientation, and a thousand things to which the media is able to spin you up about.  Some things make me snicker when I read them, and others make me shake my head in disbelief.  For example, I still haven't figured out what cultural appropriation is all about. I have a good friend whose home is decorated in minimalist Japanese style. Her husband was stationed in Japan during the late fifties and sixties, and she fell in love with the culture.  After her husband died, she decided to keep her home as it was in honor of his memory.  Why is that 'wrong'?  I also have another 'white' friend who loves blues music from the 20's and 30's.  Is it wrong to enjoy, collect, and submerge yourself in another culture?  Do you have to denounce your 'ethnicity' to enjoy the expressions of another race's culture?  Why is it offensive for 'white' people to enjoy the clothing, foods, and cultural trapping of another culture? These are questions I've been asking every time I read an article about 'white privilege.'  So, added to the many things we are in turmoil about, white people must now experience the angst of being 'white.'
I was saddened the other day by a headline in my news feed titled "Amy Schumer apologizes for being white."  Although the headline was misleading, (She actually was saying her last movie role would have been better suited to a woman of color), it is interesting that the subject was even broached.  It speaks to a deeper issue dealing with being comfortable in your own skin.  Now, of course this is easier said by a white male. 
Still, without being glib in any way, what are you going to do about who you are? 
YOU ARE WHAT YOU ARE.  No matter what others might think of you, or what you think about yourself, you are what you see in the mirror. Actually, it is sad to think that the only way we can make ourselves feel important is by demeaning someone else.  It is equally sad to think that race or culture can be used to crush, subjugate, or hold back those who are different.  However, the dialogue doesn't begin by denouncing your genetics. 
This thought was driven home to me as I read an article about Christianity being a 'white' religion.  It seems as if our universities and high schools are on a crusade to begin purging the world of 'white heterosexual, males, and more specifically Christian males.'  If Amy Schumer can feel guilty about her role not going to a woman of color, think about the implication for white males. 
This problem of dissatisfaction with who you are is not bound up in education, the media, or any other manifestation of our cultural dis-functionalism, it is because we have lost touch with the creator who made us.  It is God who gives us our real identity, and it isn't just 'white.'  Real Christians realize this.  Is there a problem here?  Yes, we have many people who call themselves Christians who have hijacked the faith and used it for their hateful spiteful purposes. When you are a real christian you won't have to apologize for who or what you are.  You also won't feel superior about who you are.  A life changing faith in Jesus Christ makes it impossible to judge yourself as greater than anyone else.
Sadly, many universities and high schools are beginning to teach racism, and cultural elitism in an effort to lift minority peoples up to some invisible bar of equality. 
THERE IS NO EQUALITY!  As a vertically challenged, elderly, white male, I am here to tell you there is no equality without pulling exceptional people down.  My genetics made me a male, Caucasian, of less than average height.  It would be foolish of me to demand equality.  What part of my genetics am I going to change?  No matter how much I could protest, lobby, or push for equality, someone somewhere is going to be born taller, faster, stronger, smarter, quicker, or anything else better than I am by genetics. That is the greatest quality about true Christianity, you can be the image of God no matter your race, culture, gender, or even religion.  This one truth about the the Judaeo-Christian value system is twisted and turned around by those who don't know the Word of God.  God made us all, filled us with the breath we breathe, and gave us one simple command; Love God, and love others. If you do this with all your heart, you won't have room for privilege, hatred, or any other expression of superiority. 
At the same time, I won't feel guilty about being white, nor will I be or feel privileged for it.  I won't curse my parents for 'knowing' each other at the right time or temperature to make me male.  I also won't curse them for passing on my mother's family genome of being short. 
Like the little sparrows who are busy enjoying this lovely spring weather, I will simply rest in the knowledge that I am infinitely loved by an infinite creator who loves everyone with an undying love.  I'm truly saddened for those who don't know this.  Find God, and you will find peace.

It is an angry world I wake up to every morning.  As with all things human, I'm sure it is no more angry now than at any other time in history. We just have the ability to express that anger to a wider audience.  Our computers, our smartphones, and tablets become the vehicle of our anger, giving it greater distance than ever before.  The plumber who used to gripe to one or two people, go home, and live in relative anonymity can take their 140 character rants to a far ranging public and at least feel significant.  Instead of being some kind of cathartic release, though, it becomes the fuel for an ever increasing fire.  No one is spared the righteous indignation, nor is any fire too small to fan into a raging inferno. 
I've been writing these blogs as a release for my own need to be significant and relevant to a world that seems to be spinning out of control into chaos.  Finding the peace of God in the midst of an angry world is simply a matter of turning off the noise.  I no longer watch broadcast news of any persuasion. I did this a few years ago, and found my attitude became much better.  As an admitted christian conservative I found myself grinding my teeth, yelling at the TV, and despising people I didn't even know.  I could pick and choose what I wanted to read, or watch through the internet, so I became very selective.  Then came the 2016 elections!    I had to stop reading everything.   Then the campaigns found Facebook.  There was no place safe from the vitriol coming from both parties of our government.  So, two weeks ago I completely closed down my Facebook account. 
That doesn't stop me from being concerned about the direction our nation is headed.  While the 'left' would have us believe that there is a 'white supremacist' behind every corner, I see more evidence for an energized Anti-fa than I do for a sleeping KKK. 
Probably the greatest sorrow I feel is for the educators in our colleges, universities, and even high schools.  For being so highly educated, they have forgotten what happened to the educators in Russia, and China during their respective purges.  I mean, it's only minor history.  Something like the teachers being the first ones to be killed.  Anarchy is a monster that devours its own.  So, I pray.  I pray for love and compassion to once again rule the hearts and lives of Americans.  Will I see it?  I don't know.  Right now, as I'm writing this, I can see a squirrel scampering across the top of our fence toward a tree.  He is carrying a huge walnut in his mouth and looking for rival squirrels.  He isn't feeling the love at the moment.  This is the attitude I'm afraid will lead our young people to greater anger.  I can only pray I will be found worthy of the truth within me when the time comes. 

OPEN WINDOW, OPEN HEART

I've been busy!  Our 'new to us' house is livable, and we are moved in.  This makes my days longer and even more blurry than they were before.  It's not a complaint, just a fact.  The journey from our old home out in the country to our home in the city is in its eighteenth month.  I won't call the project complete until the outside is trimmed out and the house is painted.  Then it will be maintenance.  I'm saying all of this because I just opened a window in my office to let the cool early morning air in.   It's a cool Sunday morning, and I can hear numerous dogs barking in the distance.  The sound of traffic is something I will have to get accustomed to.  It doesn't keep me up at night, but it is louder than our old house in the country.  It reminds me of my old office at the church.  Which brings me to the title of this post.
A lot has happened since my last post.  We have a new President of our nation.  We have riots, protests, and hate mongers everywhere.  I'm not sure, but I don't think there has ever been a President who elicited death threats or violence if you admitted to voting for him.  We have angry hateful people calling other people hateful, and those people being labeled as being hateful are becoming less tolerant.  I never thought I'd see the day when colleges and universities would forbid anyone to speak. I never thought I'd see sexual rights (which aren't guaranteed) replace religious freedom (which is guaranteed).  Everyone is hunkered down in their dogmatic foxhole lobbing vitriolic mortars at one another.  If you stick your head up, you risk being sniped.  The 'left' screams resist and the 'right' screams back.  As a christian conservative, I've never felt more uneasy than I do right now. Everything I cherish and hold true is being challenged and turned on its head.  Even as I write this, I realize all it would take is someone reporting my blog as 'hate speech' and Google would close me down, but I digress.
The problem is air conditioning.  We keep our homes locked up solid all year long.  The windows are for looking through not listening. We condition our air, and end up conditioning our lives.  God forbid we should be uncomfortable. We've lost the ability to listen to one another.  When I was a young boy growing up in El Paso, Texas, we didn't have air conditioning.  We had swamp coolers, and you had to have a window open to allow the chilled air to pass through.  That window was usually in my room.  I could hear the neighbors TV sets, their fights with children and one another.  I could hear the street traffic, the sound of dogs barking, and crickets.  When neighbors met during the day, the most common question was; "did you hear 'that' last night?"  (Whatever 'that' was, was usually a neighbor forgetting everyone had a window open.)  Then, everyone started getting air conditioning.  The windows started closing, and amazingly people stopped meeting each other on the street. Chain link fences went up, and eventually bars over the windows.  I saw a picture of our old house not long ago, and it truly looks like a prison with ten foot high chain link fence and concertina wire atop it.  I can remember laying out on the grass in our front yard staring at the stars.  Now there is not grass.  It looks like a prison yard. I used to live in a neighborhood where all the kids knew each other and were free to play outside until nine at night.
Now, my neighborhood is digital.  Facebook, instagram, and snapchat have replaced meeting people face to face.  Husbands and wives text each other in the same room instead of talking.  Children don't even text their parents.  This is not the kind of relationships I want in the city.
Sometime soon, I'm going to put a birdbath outside the window to my home office.  I'm going to put a green table close to the fence and sit at it while my neighbors do their thing.  We are going to invite people over for Sunday dinner.  We'll sit down and discuss the disgust we see around us.  We'll open our windows and hopefully hear the occasional sounds of life beyond the TV set.  I'll be glad to hear the sparrows skittering and splashing in their bath.  I will open my window and open my heart, which is pretty amazing for me considering I'm an introvert.  

Oh For Grace To Trust Him More

If you've been reading this blog for any length of time, you already know the quiet hours of the morning are my favorite time to read the Bible and pray. Right now, my office at the church is probably an oven, so I don't even bother going there. During the cold of winter, and the dead of summer, I have to avoid my office, mainly because it costs so much to heat and cool the church just for me to sit in an office. Putting in a window air conditioner works against the beauty of opening the window and hearing the sparrows as they flutter just outside of it. So, I'm writing this from the confines of my office at home.  I can't see or hear the sparrows, but I know they are still trusting God for their daily provision.  

Oh Yeah, I was talking about bible reading and prayer time. I thank God for His word, and the presence of His Holy Spirit. Without them, I don't know if I would be able to be writing this right now. It's been a tumultuous couple of months. Actually it's been a trying, and painful, and painful, and . . . well painful couple of months. It's alright for a Christian to say that. I don't know how it became unfashionable to admit to being in adverse situations, but I do know most Christians today feel as if it is sinful to admit you're in a trial. I've been in a trial for the last two months. If that's sinful, then, I've sinned. Actually, I've longed for the sparrow's perch, if for no other reason than to find those moments of peace I find there. All around me things have sped out of control. These last two months have been the leanest for work that I've had since I began being a handyman. The biggest struggle I have with that, is not being able to support the ministries I've made pledges to. If one more person tells me to have faith, I think I'm going to scream. I've been living by faith for the last eight years. Every job I get is the provision of God. Not just in some obscure way, but purely by the direction of the Holy Spirit. I don't advertise. The signs on my truck are the only advertisement I have. So, when the phone rings, I know it is a direct result of the Holy Spirit prompting someone's heart. Before the end of May, I had work scheduled through the beginning of August. Then came the cancellations. I went around shaking my head in disbelief. If the phone rang, I hesitated to answer it for fear it was another cancellation. I have to admit, my trust, and faith were tested. I was ready to go back into the job market, but I kept getting just enough work to keep afloat, even being able to go to Corpus Christi for our family reunion.

During this last two months, I've also had to endure some things I'd rather not ever deal with. Just the fact that I'm able to type once again is exciting to me. While working on a roof about two weeks ago, I tripped on my own two feet and fell while holding my tape measure. The belt clip sliced through my ring finger on my right hand. NOT FUNNY. Thankfully, I didn't fall off the roof. If I had, Glenda would have killed me. I'm only now getting full movement back in my pinky and ring finger. Praise God. It could have been worse. I thought of Psalm 91 as I climbed down the ladder.

I think the thing that rocked me the most was losing a long time friend this week to a tragic car accident. He was a loving, caring, and generous man, who I will miss greatly. He helped me to get my feet on the ground in the handyman business. The circumstances of his death were senseless. It sucked my breath away when I heard about it. There are very few men I will drop what I'm doing and go help them out, but Terry Stambaugh was one of those men. When I was starting out, and I would wonder where my next job was going to come from, Terry would call. I knew he was listening to the Holy Spirit. I look forward to meeting him on the other side of this vale.

Then to add insult to injury, one of the young ladies of our church family was in a terrible car accident yesterday morning. She survived, but with terrible injuries. To make matters worse, I have no way to go visit the family. Her father is the reason I launched out into being God-employed. Her surgery went well, and I believe God for her full recovery. Still, my prayers are with her and the family.

Then I get a phone call from Glenda telling me her dad fell last night. He's going blind, and he needs to come home with her. LONG PAUSE! Our home is not blind friendly. We have numerous steps into the house, in the house, and we live in the country. Panic!!!!!! For about five minutes. Then it happened. God's grace came over me. I won't bore you with every thing the Holy Spirit spoke into my heart, but I will share with you my Sparrow moment. Without adversity, trial, or conflict, grace can't be released into our lives. There can't be a miracle without something that demands a miracle be done. There can't be peace without a trial to make it's presence known, and we can't know trust if we don't have a reason to trust. Happiness can come from anything, but joy is the triumphant exultation of faith over the adverse circumstances of life. When grace is released into our lives, we no longer care about what brought us there, but only about Christ being THERE with us.

I don't know if tomorrow I will have another job, I don't even have the promise of tomorrow, but I do know in whom I believe, and I am persuaded that He is able to keep everything I've given to him. (Dave's paraphrase.) The big question is: What have I given him? I believe He will see me through anything that I trust him with. Nearly eight years ago, I gave him my income. My livelihood is in his hands. My health is in his hands. My dreams for tomorrow are in his hands. My father-in-law is in his hands. Like the old hymn says, “Oh for grace to trust him more.” Thank you sweet Holy Spirit for your abiding presence.   

Updating the Sparrow

I am in the process of updating my blogs, and it seems only fitting that I begin with this blog. From the very beginning, the Sparrow’s Perch was intended to be a deeply personal blog about my faith life. I wanted the opportunity to share those wonderful moments of divine peace that can only be found in the Presence of God. The Sparrow’s Perch is a wonderful outlet for me, but I find myself wishing for more time to complete other endeavors. For a long time, I've been promising to let you know how the idea for the Sparrow's Perch came about. So, here it is. The idea for the Sparrow’s Perch came to me as I began to think about the end of my days upon this mortal vale, and whether I’d done anything to advance the Kingdom of God. Writing the blog has allowed me to empty myself of regrets, share experiences that might help someone else, and to declare the awesomeness of God. Most of all I wanted to impart the knowledge that there is a place in Christ where we can live in peace with this life, and the life to come. The title is based upon Psalms 91. Our Pastor encouraged us to read the Psalm as part of our daily bible reading as an encouragement to live in the peace of God. I haven’t always lived in the peace of God, and I haven’t always liked Psalms 91. As time went by, I actually began to despise the Psalm because it didn’t ring true with me. The promises seemed empty, and hollow against the harsh realities of my life. I watched in horror as people who I knew loved the Lord, suffered, became deathly ill, were left destitute, and saw their mortal tent swept away by unending storms. I became completely disheartened, refusing to read it anymore when a dear brother in the Lord fell victim to a brain tumor. I wanted to believe the promises, but battled with the reality. Then…I went to Nicaragua, and everything changed. It would take a book to explain what happened to me in Nicaragua. Suffice it to say, I was overcome with love, passion, and a sense of helplessness in the face of so much need. The circumstances in my life hadn’t changed. A matter of fact, when I came back, I came back to a home that was falling down around me, with little chance of ever having the money to repair, or build another one, but I didn’t care, because I’d seen people living in conditions much worse than mine. I came home to my wife’s vehicle refusing to start no matter what we did, with no financial means to repair, or buy another one. I wanted to be upset, but there were pastors in Nicaragua who didn’t have a vehicle at all. I also came home to a mass of credit card debt so daunting, I didn’t know if I could ever pay it off. The stuff I owned felt like chains to me, especially in light of what I saw in Nicaragua. In Nicaragua, many pastors live day to day, without many of the things I’d sold my soul to buy. It was in this moment of profound internal conflict, that I saw my own life measured in the mirror of those whose lives seem less encumbered. I had a realization of what I’d been missing for so long. I went into my office at the church, opened the window, and heard the song of the sparrows as they danced in the water on the flat roof. The undeniable truth was, I’d chosen the comfort of this life over the presence of God. It was in this moment I cried out, “God either kill me, or let me feel you once more as a raging fire in my life.” Instead, He did something I was unprepared for. He filled me with the most amazing peace I’ve ever known. The struggle was over. The sparrow had meaning to me. I understood Psalm 91 better than I ever had. So, without going verse by verse and boring you to tears, let me say this. Just imagine Moses sitting outside the Tabernacle watching the procession of offerings, which are the business of forgiveness, and spying a tiny sparrow flying into the Holy of Holies. Within the courtyard of the tabernacle, it has no fear of the fowler, it has no fear of the arrow, it has no fear of disease, or pestilence. The presence of God is not a place, it is a mindset. We can go there no matter where we are. The world may be falling down around us, our bodies may be racked with pain, wars may rage, evil may abound, but there is a place of refuge, a tent for shelter, and a fortress from the storms of life. There is a place we can live in peace with everything around us, and that place is called the Presence of God. I don’t care how long you’ve lived for Christ, or how much you think you know, if you’ve not found the place in your heart where the Presence of God is, then you are missing out on the best promises of God. Since that first trip to Nicaragua, God has continued to provide in miraculous ways. I still have a home that is falling down around my ears, my wife has a vehicle that barely runs, but we did manage to pay off all of our debt. I’ve made four trips to Nicaragua, and my wife has made two. Last year, in a moment of weakness, I questioned the need to go again. The money it takes to go is substantial in ways that I don’t want to address in this blog. As I drove home one afternoon, shortly before our last trip, I was grousing about a sudden drop off in my business. “I’ll just stop going.” I muttered. “It’s just becoming too hard.” The reply leapt into my spirit, “NO, I’ve propelled you to love, don’t shrink back.” There are so many wonderful people there, who mean so much to me. There is still work to be done, and I believe that we are still going to be a part of the work there. So, I’ll continue to go, until God impresses on me that I no longer need to go. I will run this race until my legs can’t run any longer. Now it is important to me to finish stronger than I began. There are people who need the love God has given me. There are people who need to know the meaning of the Sparrow’s Perch. At the end of our days, all that we have earned, and everything we valued is left behind. It is only what we have inside of us that will go with us through the veil. You see, that is what Moses saw, the little Sparrow could go boldly before the throne of grace, flying easily into the presence of God. The Sparrow’s Prayer; May you know the presence of God, and the joy of grace as I know it. May you know the full salvation of Christ Jesus, and live in the light of His love, free from the cares of this world. May you live in the Presence of God, and know His tender heart as I do.

Of Skunks, Shields, and Beatrice Bandersnatch

Have I mentioned yet, I hate skunks.  I know, I’ll probably get nasty terse comments from those of you who have had your pet skunk neutralized, sanitized, and , made house compatible, but it won’t change my opinion one bit.  I live out in rural northwest Arkansas, amidst cow pastures, deer runs, squirrels, armadillos, roadrunners, ground hogs, and other wildlife.  I enjoy them all, except for the skunks. 

When we first moved here in 1995, I didn’t know how prolific, nor did I have a clue as to how determined the little creatures are to take up residence underneath your home.  After about the twelfth ‘skunking’ in less than a year, I finally succeeded in securing my home from their attacks.  These attacks usually came on Saturday nights just before church, so I began calling them the skunks from hell.  Every once in a while, I’ll let down my defenses, and one of the little buggers will slip in through some impossible hole.  This has gone on for nearly eighteen years now, until Beatrice Bandersnatch came along.

Beatrice Bandersnatch is a jet black miniature . . . .something.  We were told she is a ‘pidoodle’ but I don’t know what that is.  All I do know is that when she first came to our home as a small puppy, she left her pidoodle puddles everywhere.  This tendency forced me to put her out on our enclosed patio on the back of our home.  We put her out at night, and leave her there during the day while we are at work.  One of the unintended benefits of her being on the patio is a rapid decline in skunk attacks.  “Bea”, as we call her, is a yapper.  Her sense of smell is terrible, but she can hear birds in the back yard, squirrels in the pecan tree, and . . . other dogs barking everywhere.  SHE IS TERRITORIAL!  She loves people, but can’t stand critters, especially birds.  (This is one of the reasons I go to the Church office to enjoy the sparrows.)  Did I mention that Bea is not my dog?  She belongs to my wife, but that is another story. 

Anyway, for the last four years, we’ve enjoyed relative freedom from skunks, until two nights ago. After four years of potty training, and battling with her to keep her off of our bed, I finally relented to allowing Bea into the house on cold nights.  The first two nights went remarkably good, she slept in her bed, didn’t yap, and she didn’t leave any surprises.  Sunday night, the temperature was surprisingly warm for December, so Bea wanted to stay out on the patio.  Out she went.

Then it happened. 

I have a few questions for the Lord when we get to heaven, and one of them will be about skunks.  The unmistakable aroma of skunk began to waft through our bedroom, and Glenda moaned “There’s skunks under the house.”  

“There can’t be.”  I replied while desperately hoping it was all a bad dream.  Then I heard Bea barking her head off.  I got up, turned on the porch light, and looked out the back door.   The door to the patio was closed, I opened the door just a crack , and was assaulted by the most violent odor on earth.  In all my time on this earth, I’ve never smelled such a high concentration of skunk smell.  I quickly closed the door, and retreated into our ‘stinky’ house.  Bea continued to do her territorial bark for nearly two hours, while I tossed and turned in the pit of skunk hell. 

Discovering what happened would have to wait till that afternoon, as my wife, and I both leave before daybreak for work. 

When I got home yesterday evening, I began my walk around the usual places where the skunks have gone in before.  Everything was good.  Then I came around the backyard.  Needless to say, it was not good.  The smell was deadly to say the least.  There, at the bottom of the glass door leading to our patio was this dinner plate sized greasy splotch of skunk spray.  The picture of what happened, became  clear to me in an instant.  Bea, who’d been in the house for the last few days, had ‘surprised’ a skunk as it made its way around our home.  In terror at the sight of this ferocious black creature barking at it, the skunk let go.  SPLAT all over the glass.  

I began to laugh as I realized how remarkably funny this must have been.  If it hadn’t been for the glass door, Bea would be a stinky ball of fur in a kitchen sink being washed with tomato juice.  She had a shield, but she didn’t know it.  For her, the glass is a boundary to her freedom.  It keeps her from running the yard as she likes to do.  (She has never run away in the four years we’ve owned her.)  We actually keep her in the patio to protect her from the many coyotes that infest the area.  She isn’t afraid of anything except for my brother’s white Labrador that passed away just recently.  Without fear, we knew she was no match for the pack of coyotes that roam the area.  Therefore, she is in her glass cage, free to bark, free to live, but not free to run at night.  It was at this moment that I had a Spiritual insight.

Christ is our shield.  He is there, transparent, but strong.  From the outside, to those looking in, it may appear as if Christians are imprisoned within a glass cage of silly rules that have no apparent purpose.  Beyond our transparent shield, there are so many harmless pleasures that can be enjoyed.  Outside of the confines of the ‘patio’ is a world just waiting to be discovered.  To outsiders, the patio of our faith must appear to be a cruel, rigid prison.  The glass ‘rules’ of kindness, compassion, love, and forgiveness, are not conducive to success in this modern world.  The posts of prayer and bible study are a waste of time to those who’ve never experienced the strength they provide in times of trial.  The shield of faith goes unseen, until the enemy comes at us.  Then we realize how valuable it is.  Those things that would destroy us, splatter harmlessly against it, while we continue to yap at the enemy from the other side.  We find shelter in the Lord of Hosts.  We still see the evil around us, but it doesn’t come nigh our tent.  Does the stench of sin still waft all around us?  Yes, but we are untouched by it.  Does the enemy still prowl around at night seeking to devour?  Yes, but he is repelled by the power of Christ’s love for us. 

As my days on this earth become fewer, I’ve learned to trust the shield of faith.  Psalm 91 has become a mantra for me.  I’m like the little sparrow that nests within the framework of the tabernacle, my shield, my fortress, my residence is within the presence of God.  I only keep my eyes open to see the surprise on the face of the wicked when their best efforts splatter against the shield of faith.  I meditate upon the transparent glass of faith, able to see out, but not desiring to ‘be’ out.  That is the new creation I’ve become in Christ Jesus. 

It cost me a night of sleep, but it was a good lesson.  

Selling Jesus

I've only been a salesman once in my life.  I'm not knocking it for those who do it.  Back in 1976, I did a short stint selling Harley Davidson Motorcycles, (Actually bowling pin motorcycles, as they were owned by AMF at the time.)  I grew up around Harleys, and I believed in them, so, selling them wasn't hard for me.  I actually enjoyed selling them, because I enjoyed selling people something I enjoyed myself.  There was a day when being a 'peddler,' or 'merchant' was a noble profession.  I can still remember the Fuller Brush salesman who knew my mother by name, or the milkman who delivered the milk to my grandmother many years ago.  Avon, Mary Kay, Tupperware, and on, and on, and. . . .Well you get the picture.  Men, are more industrial in their acceptance of sales people.  I myself tend to despise the salesman who tells me I have to have his product.  I especially despise the salesman who calls me without having tried to meet me first.  I despise gimmicks   Sell me the product, not the peanut brittle you have in your hand.  AND, when you leave, leave the peanut brittle.  If you are the manager of any sort, you know what I mean.  

What concerns me is the selling of Jesus.  I'm not talking about the shameless hucksterism that has always been a part of the Christian experience.  From the birth of Christianity, there were always those who saw a quick buck to be made in selling Jesus.  The Apostle Paul bemoaned their existence, but looked at them as one more way that people came to a knowledge of Jesus Christ.  He didn't care how Christ was glorified, but was overjoyed that Christ was preached.

I don't know if I'm as tolerant as Paul.  As the pendulum of public approval for Christians begins to swing back toward antagonism, I wonder if the hucksters aren't doing us more damage than good. I don't think you can 'sell' the relationship that is derived from the presence of God being in your life. I'm not talking about those people who offer you dancing angel mirror balls for your generous love offering.  These people are like the money changers in the Temple court.  They are obvious, and at the same time oblivious to what they are doing.  What I'm talking about are the people who promise you that a life with Christ will be a bed of roses, a walk in the park, tea at tea time, and a host of other platitudes that are far from truthful.  This thinking is clearly seen when you start pushing against them with even a hint of persecution, or let discomfort, or trials enter into their life.  BUT, I thought. . .  You said . . . .I spoke. . . I claimed. . . .WHY!!!!!!???????  Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.  I don't want to be different.

The real Presence of God will make you different.  The Presence of God will raise the hackles on the back of the 'world.'  The Presence of God casts it's light into the dark corners of men's lives, and makes them uncomfortable.  The purveyors of the pasty, wimpy, and murdered Jesus, don't want you to realize the power of the resurrected, living Jesus.  Jesus on the cross is acceptable, Jesus in the tomb is preferred, but Jesus cooking fish by the seashore is offensive.  The Presence of God burns away the desires for the things of this world and leaves you a smoking offering of love to a dying world.  COMFORT?   I don't think so.  You can sell a hundred thousand crosses, but few people want to carry their own.  Those who sell a 'feel good' Jesus don't really believe in what they are 'selling.'  They aren't familiar with the product.

We don't have to sell Jesus.  All we have to do is give away what he gave us to give.  Therein lies the problem.  He gave us the power to Heal, Save, and Deliver men, and women.  He left His Spirit here for us to know He was still here.  You can't sell these things.  I can't sell you something you can't see, taste, or touch.  What I can do, is be Him for you.  THAT'S THE HARD PART.  That is how you will know He is real.  I know this much, I can't live without him.  I want you to feel the same way.  That is my heart set before all men.  I love this man named Jesus Christ, even though I've never seen him.  My life with HIM is not the same as it was without him.  I've been sick, injured, addicted, persecuted, beat down, destitute, and looked death in the eye, but in all of this I've never felt alone.  That, my friends, is the testament to His Presence.  He said he would not leave us as orphans.  He will not abandon us, even if we abandon Him.

oooooppppps!  I'm selling Jesus.

Try Him, I think you'll like Him.