These two words have hit close to home this week, in a very personal way. My Aunt on my father's side, is in the hospital recovering from hip surgery, and her husband is in another hospital in ICU fighting for his life. They both have been special people in my life, but as I grew older, and had children of my own, the ability to visit them, and even maintain a long distance relationship with them dwindled. Most of my fondest childhood memories are of summer vacations to visit her, and my grandmother. Their home was always full of love. My brothers and cousins were the children they never had, and believe me, we knew it.
Now in their seventies, I watch with great sadness as old age begins to encroach on their once active lives. My aunt was once a powerhouse of a woman, moving effortlessly in the halls of education, the state capital, and actively involved in the politics of the state. Now, her body is betraying her, as all of our bodies do. The bright, and brilliant mind that challenged so many lives to be better than they could be, is locked in a battle with pain.
The question is; Do I mourn? Do I allow myself to succumb to hopelessness and fear? Will her husband live long enough for the two of them to hold hands once more before they pass this vale? Will she gently kiss his lips once more, and reassure him of her love before he breathes a last breath? These are the questions that race through my mind as I offer up prayers for the both of them. "Father God, don't let them pass this life this way."
The strange part of all of this, is that I don't feel sadness about my Uncle passing. His lived a long, rich, and rewarding life. He's done things I could only dream of doing. What does cause me sorrow, is the thought of him dying while my aunt is unable to be by his side. Somehow this is unacceptable to me. It is the only thing that causes me to be sad.
You see, what this moment has caused me to see, is that I wouldn't want to die alone. We all deserve to die with someone holding our hand, and comforting us as we enter into eternity. My Uncle was there at my grandmother's bedside as she passed away. My grandfather was at my grandmother's side when she passed. For some reason, this is important to me. I wouldn't want to take my last breath without my wife being by my side, and I wouldn't want her to go without my being there. We come into this life surrounded by a host of people rejoicing at our moment of birth. We are handed around to family like a prize. Happy smiling faces surround us as we enter this vale, loving faces should usher us home. That thought alone causes my lower lip to tremble and tears to roll down my cheeks. It is why a soldiers death, or brutal senseless murders, cause me to cry. No one should pass alone.
I am a man possessed of hope, and I hate for anyone to be alone, especially as they breathe their last.
