35 Days In: Tough Week

It’s now day 35 on the Daniel fast.  I’m almost ashamed to admit it, but this is the longest I’ve ever gone in my life without a soda pop.  This is definitely the longest I’ve gone without eating meat of any kind.  I feel great physically, and I’m still enjoying the sense of freedom that flows from being in a fast. The desire to complete the fifty days was dealt a serious blow this week, when my business hit a serious slowdown.

 AN UNEXPECTED SLOWDOWN

As a handyman, I’m accustomed to my business slowing two times a year.  It usually slows down about a week before Thanksgiving, and continues being slow until right after Christmas.  I’m also accustomed to it slowing down about the last week of May until about the fourth of July.  That is why I’m able to go to Nicaragua during June.  This year instead of doing the usual missions trip to Nicaragua, I chose to attend our family reunion in Corpus Christi on the Fourth of July.  I miss my brothers, and this may be the last time my parents and other members of their families will be able to get together due to their ages.  So, it seemed important to forego the mission trip.  WOW!!   I was not prepared for the summer slowdown to hit this early.  Actually, I’d hoped to be busy enough to make it all the way up to the week before leaving.  I’d saved enough money to make the trip, but now I may have to rethink.  I may need that money to pay bills.  

What does all of that have to do with the fast?  Everything!  When you are in a fast, there is a heightened spiritual awareness.  As someone who depends upon the Lord’s provision daily, (I’m not truly self-employed, but God-employed) I’ve been wrestling with all kinds of doubt, and yes, fear over whether I’ve made the right decisions.  Not stark raving fear, but nagging, life sapping worry.  It would be a lie to say that I haven’t wondered what is going on.  I’ve watched two big jobs get cancelled because the clients had financial reversals.  The phone was silent, and I hung out at the church for three days last week.  All the while, I was wondering if I’d made the wrong decision on not going on the mission trip.  Maybe I should have tried to do both.  As it looks right now, I may not have the money to even go to Corpus Christi.  Did I miss the Lord in this one?  When I began the fast, everything looked good, now, as it is drawing to a close I find myself facing one of the worst slowdowns I’ve ever been in.  At sixty years old, I am too old to begin looking for a new job, and even if I did, I wouldn’t be able to attend the family reunion. Still, if I have to go back into the job market I will, I just don't want to move so hastily that I miss out on something good. (Edited Part that got dropped: I believe God will make a way, He always has, and always will) So, I hope you can understand, that my spirit was under great attack last week.  I have enough work this week to pay tithes, pay bills, and keep gas in the rig, but it won’t be enough if I don’t get some work.  I’d appreciate any prayers, or even spiritual word from those who love me and care for me. I don’t like taking from people, so I prefer prayers.  I like work, so work would be great.  Please uphold me in prayer.

PLEASE PRAY

As I’ve sought the Lord during this time of fasting, I’ve been asking Him to do a special work in our faith family.  I've been reluctant to share the request, because there is no good way to explain it without it appearing to be self-serving.  I would like to see our fellowship blessed so that I can leave the handyman business behind, and work at the church full time.  At the same time, I don't want to take away from the many churches, and missions that we serve. There are many things that need to be done in our old building, that we don't have the funds to do because we are sending so much money to foreign missions.  I have the skills to fix the problems, but I'm still not old enough to retire.  I know it sounds selfish, but at the same time, it's what I truly want in my heart of hearts. So, if you’ve been following me in this, please pray that God will move in this area, or at least allow me to know if the answer is 'no.' I can continue to do handyman work for another couple of years, but I'm still strong, and would like to concentrate my strength on getting our wonderful building brought up to prime condition.   

  

In the personal arena, I’m still needing God to move on two issues I’ve placed before Him.  One of them is attitudinal, and the second is behavioral.   I began this fast with the expectation for a great move of God in my life, and in our faith family.  Still hoping, if not a little bruised. 

I don’t like to share the negative stuff, but sometimes you have to in order for people to know how miraculous God’s deliverance is.  I’m expecting awesome answers, and to share an awesome testimony of what God has done in my life, and the lives of my faith family. 

Now, on to some good stuff.  Spiritual revelation unrelated to work continues to be powerful.  When I read God’s word, I’m able to see things I’ve never seen before.  It’s fun to have new ideas explode into my head as I read.  I especially enjoy having old ideas challenged by new revelation. 

Another bright spot, is how my emotions seemed to have come under greater control.  I am a passionate person on all emotional levels, with anger being the worst.  Frustration, conflict, and fear often won the day in the past.  Now, it takes a lot to push me over the top.  I think a lot of it has to do with a decrease in sugar intake linked to an increase in spiritual intake.  There would have been a day when the slowdown I faced last week would have caused me to be irritable with Glenda, and others around me.  Instead, I found myself calmly concerned.  Now for those of you who have mastered your angers and fears, don’t judge me too harshly, just continue to pray with me that God will do a complete work in me.

PHYSICAL SIDE OF THE FAST  

Finally, the physical changes!  The weight loss seemed to have slowed down, I only lost two pounds this week I’m now at 166 pounds.  However, I did have to take my belt up another notch!?  Confused about that, but I’m sure someone knows how that can be.  I’d figured that a notch in my belt equated to about seven pounds of weight loss, but not the case this week.  Having gone through the de-tox phase in the second week, I was surprised when I had another event this week.  Thankfully I was at the church that day, and it didn’t affect my work.

 

I’m loving this fast more than anything I’ve done spiritually in a long time.  After the fast is over, I’ll try hard to live as close to the lifestyle it has wrought in me.  I truly believe it was ordained of the Holy Spirit in order to bring me to a healthier, more balanced me.   I’m not satisfied with 21, or even 50 days, I want more.  If in the end of this, I’m not ruled by my emotions, my gut, or even the crazy fears that arise out of everyday life, I’ll be a happy man.